Well-known behaviour consultant and acclaimed Positive Education author, Madhavi Nawana Parker, makes some helpful recommendations regarding the vital role that parents play.
- Resist the temptation to rescue your child. To enable students to become successful people, we need to let them fall, and to face natural (safe) consequences. Examples given are making a special trip into school because your child left his or her hat (or PE gear) at home. The consequence: your child might have to sit undercover, or watch the rest of the class participate in PE. These will not harm your child. These will, however, be important experiences in fostering personal organisation and resilience. According to Madhavi and other experts in the field, rescuing children only teaches them that they do not need to be organised, nor that you have faith in their ability to handle their own problems. If you work with the school in these situations, your children will be the winners. Child safety will never be compromised.
- Have a list on the wall (perhaps with pictures for young children) of the independent steps required to be efficient before and after school. For example, the morning list might say bathroom, breakfast, dishes, teeth, lunch-box, room (tidy). Another list could establish the habit of doing as many independent tasks as possible the night before. Remember that every child is capable of assisting in the home.
- Consider establishing a quiet time, when the whole family is doing homework, including you. Don’t do their homework for them, but it is suggested that you have a homework consultation time (“I am available for homework advice between 6.00pm and 8.00 pm.”) to help alleviate procrastination. Stick to your time as this assists the development of organisation skills.
- Be pleased for your child when classes, extracurricular teams, Innov8 groups, or camp activities are mixed, as they are given opportunities to expand their friendship group. In previous schools, I have seen parents unsettle their child by stressing about student activity groupings but Investigator parents know better! Thank you for repeatedly trusting your child’s judgement, and that of their teachers.
- Be solution-focused when dealing with problems. Ask, “What do you think you could do about that?” rather than telling or lecturing them.
- Offer encouragement, love, and optimism. Show that you believe they can perform tasks and sort out minor issues for themselves. Try to put incidents “to bed” at the time so the facts don’t get distorted. A catastrophe scale works well here: is it an ant or an elephant? In the past, I have seen parents racing into school to sort out an “ant” for their child, under the misguided belief that they are helping. Remember that children actually take pride in doing things themselves. Please also remember that we teach as a profession because we love to help children flourish, and that we have their best interests of the children in mind when making decisions. Student outcomes are maximised when parents work with our wonderful Investigator teachers as partners and offer mutual support. The feedback I am receiving this year about our 2023 staff team is overwhelmingly positive, and we really appreciate this.
Congratulations, Jodie O’Donnell!
I know you will all join me in congratulating Jodie O’Donnell on her official appointment as the Head of Investigator Senior School. Jodie, who has been in an acting role since December, has impressed students, parents, staff, and community members alike with her incredible attention to detail, positivity, and dedication to helping students and staff achieve optimal outcomes. As an award-winning History (and Tourism) teacher herself, as well as a committed Investigator parent, Jodie is an exceptional role model, and we all feel immensely proud of her. The outstanding feedback I have received from Senior School families this year comes as no surprise. Congratulations, Jodie!
